Latest updated figures at 17:37 3 March 2000
Contributions to be made via the newsgroup.
If I've failed to notice the subtle chink of
your small change hitting my newsreader,
please nudge me.

If you were, perhaps, thinking of not making a contribution -- it is only fair to warn you that thanks to the donation of, apparently, a, um, "snipper riffle" the campaign is now armed. We were always dangerous. Pass us by at your peril. Now... isn't that small change in your pocket getting just a tad heavy (or are you just pleased to etc?)

You've been warned... now added: the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. If you're not worried -- you should be.

Contributions are currently:

20 US dollars, 10 Deutschmarks, a 10 shilling note, and a Chinese- looking coin arrangement with a square hole in the middle a few decimal ha'pennies and old-style ten-pence coins, 25 Canadian cents, a pre-Independence quarter rupee and 7.5 francs 6.50 Deutchmarks, 25 Pesetas, 2 Francs, 500 Lira, 5 pence and 20 something or others from the Confederatio Helvetica, $5 (Canadian), 10 Guilders, 10 DMarks, 100 Francs (Belgian), 20 Francs (Swiss), 50 Francs (French), 5 Irish Punts, 200 rupees (Sri Lankan) and $58 (US) and a £10 credit voucher from WH Smiths, five pound voucher for Oddbins (withheld until further notice), some notes in French Francs, Swiss Francs, Swedish Kroner, Dutch Guilders, Spanish Pesetas and US Dollars (cashed in before we could get out hands on it), 12.45 francs (French) and three unidentified small keys which look as if they could belong to safety deposit boxes or left luggage lockers,IOU for R10.00 and a ten shilling note. 2p.

760 pesetas 430 drachmas, 3/9 in old thrupenny bits, 3/6 in old pennies and an Australian 6d. 11 US dollars, one dime and 5 cents 6 tickets for the Paris metro, 5 Cayman Island cents (worth about 6 US cents, or slightly less than 4 new pee (There's a spiny lobster on it), 783 yen, 1780 won, 45 Philippine pesos, 35.80 Hong Kong dollars, 300 Indonesian rupiahs, 8.75 Singapore dollars, 20 Malaysian ringgits, 10 Brunei dollars, 32 Thai baht, 2 kopeks, 50 Indian rupees, 35 French francs and 7 Gibraltarian pence I received in change from the local grocer yesterday, the swine, 9 South Island pounds, a 100 Finnish Markka note, 9 Swedish kronor and a Somerfield voucher for a Pizza Hut meal for two for 9.99. 54 Tiger Tokens, 2000 roubles, 400 Ukrainian something-or-others, 50 Finnish Markka, 35 Swedish Kronor, 40 Norwegian Crowns, 10 Dm, 25 Dutch Guilders and 70 Belgian Francs. And some washers. 55000 (old) roubles (all unconvertible notes) 253 yen (plus one coin with a hole in the middle but no arabic numerals on it) 6 aussie $, and a whole bunch of coins that can't be worked out, 40 (pronounced) gryvna, assorted nlg, deutschmarks (including a 10dm note), french and swiss francs and more us cents than one could shake a stick at.

16 Pula from Botswana, ninety seven US cents and 2 dollars twelve cents Canadian, an NUS voucher for a free hamburger for every meal eaten in Macdonalds and an old 500 lire note. USD 2, FGL 3.5, FFR 50, 20 Rupees and about 18000 Korean Wan. Assorted small change in francs, pesetas, lire, US dollars, schillings, drachmae and guilders, a Mark or two and a Vietnamese dong.

A Bailiwick of Jersey 5 shilling coin, 25 Egyptian piastres, an Irish penny, an American cent, an old 5p, and 150 Jordanian fils. And a thousand Iranian rials. 374 air yards, 25 Canadian cents, 10 Barbados cents, 10 Gibraltan pence, 10 Irish pence, 10 American cents, 3 schillings and 30 grotty groschen (Austrian, that is), a few pointless lira and swiss wotsits, a couple of old-style French 10 franc coins, a whole pile of centimes, a few mouldy peanuts, three dead woodlice, a flat battery, the missing button on the remote control and a pile of fluff. And a five pound note. Some, uncounted,Belgian Francs,Swiss franks a few Lira ,a $C2coin and a $10.00 bill oh and a record token for 7/6 from 1969.

11 thruppenny bits (bronze), 2 thruppenny bits (silver), 2 sixpence (silver), 1 unidentified thingie with arabic on it, 1 Manchester ship canal halfpenny token (1793), Diez Centimos (Spanish, 1879), various pennies & halfpennies from 1747 to 1927, 1 shilling (1872), 1 Isle of Man 2p (1993), French Fr (various different issues) 30 fr 40 centimes; 3 Deutschmarks, 20 pfennigs; 40 Belgian Fr, 100 Italian Lire, US$ 11 cents & 1 dime, whatever that is; 10 Singapore cents; 3 Swiss Fr 50; 2.05 Yugoslav Dinar; 25 Spanish pesetas, with a picture of General Franco on the reverse; 2.55 Greek drachma; 43 Canadian cents, endless pre-1989 Romanian lei, which are falling to bits and probably worth about tenpence, a few Hungarian forints, a fair number of Bulgarian leva; about 20000 Lire, 7 DEMS, 3000 Slovenian tolars, and three Slovenian telephone tokens. 10 Australian dollars, 3 Sing(h?) dollars. And there's 2 pounds 50 worth of points on a WH Smith Club Card and 100 Sainsbury's Club Card points to match. One old UK penny, two farthings, and 8 silver threepenny bits. Assorted foreign coinage, includes pesetas, Swiss francs, Belgian francs, escudos, drachma and a US quarter. 500,000 Turkish Lira (estimated value 55p).

And finally, a 20 euro stamp and a brass razoo.

Grand Total: ooh, quite a lot really

Goods offered for sale (a table-top sale in the village hall perhaps?):

One potted fern, one ancient Siemens-Nixdorf 486 PC (g.w.o., no monitor), a small terra-cotta statue of Buddha (frayed at edges), some till receipts, one mouse mat (pre-owned), and the autographs of Roy Castle & Patrick Moore, Some string. One pack of Pickled Onion flavour Monster Munch, some old farthings which May Be Valuable plus a modest selection of 286 and 386 PCs that could be turned into some semblence of working order. Assorted unidentified keys plus non-functioning watches and cigarette lighters. One bronze-effect cigarette lighter from Turkey in the form of a sculptured dragon (Non-working). A pair of those glasses you can use to view an eclipse. 1 bar of 'complimentary' herbal soap from the Hotel Classic, New Road, Kathmandu, Nepal. An Osborne personal computer, circa 1980 (looks like a sewing machine), 36 AOL sign on CDs, 4 Which Online sign on CDs, I copy of Dos Stuff Microsoft forgot. Locoscript PC and dbase II. 1 plastic carrier bag (without handles), 1 slightly used drawing pin, 1 blue tea pot without lid or spout - but otherwise in good condition. A painting done by an umrat which simulates that done by The Grundy`s cow(sadly now deceased) which could by sold for a groat or two.

An original Edgar Allen Poet pöme (as yet to be written) and 1999 back copies of "Nursing Times". Wow! I may have to bid for that last one myself! Ed.

As the Grundys refuse to give up, so too do the umrats. February and we're still getting contributions. And they just keep getting more thrilling...

Two tickets for an evening of clubbing in Disney's Pleasure Island -- for an evening at the C and W club (for whoever writes the Jolene bits) or the Jazz venue or the Rock 'n' Roll place, or they could simply dine at Planet Hollywood! Or do that as well. An almost endless supply of unused ballot papers from the Durham Student Union elections.

Of course, there's only one teeny weeny problem... they have been declared bankrupt. Perhaps Eddie would like to put the proceeds under the floorboards?

Kimbo
-- 
Kimbo Bonka - the double espresso to go
HAHA / LSS LO & Founding FONT
Strumpet Extraordinaire
http://www.foca.co.uk