>
>>The Duchess of Malfi wouldn't be a barrel of laughs...
>
>I *know* there's a joke waiting to be found there about "razzle-dazzle
>'em", but I don't seem to be the one to find it!

The girls today on USENET
Go in for subtle amusemet,
So to win their hearts one must with hilarity
Talk of fish-puns and supermarket chirality.
But the writer of them all
Who will make them simply LUMGWF(AO)
Is the man people call
The coachmaker from somewhere down the road.

Brush up your Webster,
Start quoting him too.
Brush up your Webster
If the women you would woo.
Just declaim a few lines from "A Cure for a Cuckold"
And they think you're a bit of a Buck, Old
Chap. If your blonde thinks you're starting to bore 'er
Tell her what Brachiano said to Vittoria,
And if still, she treats you like a brother,
Just remind her of "A Late Murder of the Son upon the Mother"
Brush up your Webster
And they'll all go "who?".

Brush up your Webster,
Start quoting him too.
Brush up your Webster
If the women you would woo.
If your girl is on just the right level
Treat the kid to an Act of "The White Devil."
If she says that she fancies a gin
Say she looks like "The Faire Maide of the Inne"
If she wants to see Jude Law in "Alfie",
Whose Jude Law? Treat her like "The Duchess of Malfi"
Brush up your Webster
And they'll all go "who?",
And they'll all go "who?",
And they'll all go "who?".

-- 
Stephen

And sing O, the good times of Old England
In Old England very good times